busy toddler days

Jules —  May 3, 2005

I had this post all written and Anjelia climbed onto the computer desk and deleted it, so I guess I’ll try again!!!!

As Mother’s Day approaches, I am reminded of how thankful I am to be a mom. Especially since I am the mom of four little daughters. I am so glad that James and I took risks to form our family!

Anjelia has been keeping me so busy. Last week she learned how to climb onto my kitchen countertops. She gets into things before I have time to notice. All my makeup has been dug in with her little fingernails. My lipstick tubes look like they have been half eaten. If she gets a chance to get out the front door, she is halfway to the street before I can get through the door to run after her. Everytime she sees me coming she runs faster and throws whatever she’s not supposed to have. She got in trouble at MDO for getting mad and hitting 3 or 4 other toddlers.

The fourth one has definitely been more difficult to keep up with than the others!! It’s been that way since infancy. One morning, I left her at home in her car seat. Imagine my horror when I realized she wasn’t in the car. It was so embarrassing when I pulled up to Mother’s Day Out and an old youth group friend wanted to see the new baby and she wasn’t in the car!! I’ll never fully recover. It haunts me everytime I go somewhere. I have to keep looking back to make sure she’s still there! I think that day caused permanent psychological damage.

You’ve probably read this before and I’d hate to bore you, but this a great description of life as a new mom.

Before I was a Mom –

I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was a Mom –

I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn’t worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunization.

Before I was a Mom –

I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Spit on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom –

I never held down a screaming child
So that doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom –

I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn’t want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn’t stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much,
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom –

I didn’t know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn’t know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn’t know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn’t know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom –

I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
The joy,
The love,
The heartache,
The wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn’t know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

Jules

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17 responses to busy toddler days

  1. Beautiful post, Beautiful MOM. Ain’t kids wonderful.

  2. This is great. Sounds very much like being a dad…
    Poem

  3. I loved and appreciated and understood my mom even that much more after I became a mom myself.
    Happy Mothers Day to all those mommies out there
    and to my mom, too!

  4. Aunt Marilyn May 3, 2005 at 7:33 pm

    sniff, sniff, its nice to know you understand now, Deb. I loved you both through it all, dirty diapers, to this day, no matter what. Julie, a quote on my may 4th calendar says,” We play God when we do not forgive ourselves or others.” I think we all have had those moments when we wonder “What was I thinking.” I still get chills at a boner I pulled one time, and don’t ask cause I won’t talk. One I will tell about was one day I was expecting Gil’s folks for a visit and needed something from the store, and was in a hurry, so I didn’t put Deb in her carseat (It wasn’t a law then,) and the store was just a couple of min. away, and I also did not tie up the dog. Well the dog followed me and got in front of the car and I braked. Deb fell forward and cut her tongue pretty bad. I still feel awful about it. SO YOU MOMS WITH KIDS ALWAYS TAKE THE TIME TO DO THE RIGHT THING. YOU WONT REGRET IT.

  5. Just so you know. James’ business is across the street. He came over right after I left. He was a bit confused and stayed with Anjelia so she wasn’t alone more than a minute. She was sound asleep the entire time. I only drove about 3 blocks. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as it sounds, although I’m still traumatized!! I sure got teased a lot!

  6. I agree, Debbie, I appreciate my mom more!

  7. I stood during the middle of the night this last Saturday Night and looked down at this beautiful defenseless sleeping body and prayed, that as a Grandma I did everything right to get my Grandson thru the night and have a lot of fun with him. I was also never trained to be a Grandma. You do the very best you can, and pray they love you as much as you love them.

  8. Aunt Marilyn May 3, 2005 at 9:20 pm

    Some day Ian will be recounting to you, all the fun things you two did together. I’m sure he feels your love.

  9. Mom, please forgive yourself over the no carseat thing. I wasn’t permanently hurt over it. Obviously my tongue still works fine, given the length of our phone conversations (which usually involve me chattering on and on without taking a breath). You made a mistake, you learned from it. (I never hear you tell of it happening again with me or Trish.) Love ya!

  10. And Julie, you forgive yourself, too. You’re a good Mom. You just forgot to count to 4 one time. (I’m sure you know what I mean. Whenever we’re out and about–I’m always looking around counting 3 little blond heads running and playing. OK–1-2-3–all accounted for!)

  11. I have to admit that I’ve done my fair share of teasing Julie about this as James and I were over in the shop working on my beautiful kitchen cabinets at the time. It was really funny to walk in and see a baby there in the car seat and no one home. You shouldn’t feel bad at all, its those embarrassing moments that are the fun and important memories that you’ll be able to share with your children when they get older.

  12. Julie, I’m very proud of the kind of mother you are to our kids. We are all very blessed to have you.

  13. Aunt Marilyn May 4, 2005 at 7:52 pm

    Amen to that James, and they are blessed to have you for a father. Thanks Deb, I sure did learn from it.

  14. Well what can I say. Julie and James have such wonderful family and friends to be such an encouragement to them as they parent these wonderful girls. She (Julie is a wonderful Mother and Wife) and stays at it. A full time job!

  15. Thanks for your encouragement, everyone!! Lord knows I need it!!!!

  16. I’m thankful to have such an encouraging mother-in-law!!! I appreciate all of your affirmation over the years! You’ve always helped me feel good about staying at home, even when we were flat broke because of that decision. I appreciate your reminders about what’s most important! It’s made a big difference in my life!

  17. Your girls will be RICH in memories because of your choice. “Things” just don’t fill that void like good, happy memories do.