The Boob Fairy

Jules —  March 9, 2005

I dedicate this song to myself and all the other small chested ladies out there! Click here.

Your two breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies. Song of Solomon 4:5



41 responses to The Boob Fairy

  1. OH….MY…..GOSH!!! That was very funny! I have to admit…I’m afraid to say anything else so I better sign off.

    Breast wishes,


  2. And don’t you just love the scripture “Let her breasts satisfy you at all times…”

    The Bible is so cool! Why don’t we see that one on T-shirts and bumper stickers?

  3. I love it, Julie.

    And why does my husband feel the need to comment two times?

  4. Because two is the appropriate number right now.

  5. 2 cheers for boobies!

  6. The boob fairie was busy, so I got Clarence who hadn’t gotten his wings yet. Apparently, he can’t use a tape measure either.

  7. Just so everyone knows, Jimmy is James.

  8. “I’d get them done myself, if she’d just foot the bill……”

    I keep checking under my pillow to see if she has left me that $5,000 I need to “get them done myself”, but that dang fairy REALLY hates me.

    The “Pregnant Boob Fairy” (the one that supposedly gives you 3 extra cup sizes overnight) has not shown me any kindness either. Still no visit from her. I thought I was supposed to get boobs when I had babies??? What did I do to deserve this?

  9. I understand your plight, Amber, but at least you are “spunky and cute and have a great personality”!

    Maybe the boob fairy doesn’t like beautiful, six foot blondes!


  11. My back is currently killing me because they are now two gallons of milk hanging on my chest. Yes, I am THE Dairy Queen.

    If I could get ahold of that boob fairy I’d kill her, she is obsessed with me!

  12. I just have to keep commenting. . .

    It must be nice to run and not knock yourself out by boobs hitting yourself in the face.

    Count the “small” blessings (pun intended).

  13. First of all…..

    Karen- what did you say to the boob fairy that made her visit you so many times? Tell her to leave you alone & please give her my address the next time she comes to visit you. Oh, and tell her I’m really sorry if I’ve somehow offended her. She obviously loves you so maybe she will listen to you.

    Julie- You too are “spunky and cute and have a great personality”. Maybe that’s what it is….we are being discriminated against. Now it all makes sense. I guess I’ll just have to learn to love and accept my “great personality” since that stupid fairy is not leaving me any $$$.

  14. Mary, at least you got a visit from someone even if it was the wingless Clarence!

  15. MMMMMM, Dairy Queen!

    Stop it Karen! Now your making me hungry and there is a Dairy Queen two blocks from my house. I have no will power when I’m pregnant & that is NOT what I need right now. It all goes to my butt and not my boobs.

    *By the way….who doesn’t love a “Dairy Queen” (there is such a thing at the MN state fair…he, he, he). You should feel special :-)

  16. That darn butt nymph!

  17. Okay I can’t hold off anymore. After carefully debating my response in my head I have to say that I think Karen actually IS the boob fairy. You all just have to suck up to her and she might give up a little magic. Meat loaf, cake, corn on the cob, chicken enchiladas all help in the delegation of sizes. A wise friend of mine used to say (and I might say he speaks for all men) “I love boobs, I just want to take off my socks and run barefoot in a field of them”. Well said.

  18. Tom….I love you man!

  19. I think Tom may be on to something. Maybe Karen is the boob fairy. Think about it. What would you think the “Boob Fairy” should look like? Beautiful, blond, rosey cheeks, cheerful, with ample bosoms being her shining trademark.

    The only problem I have with that theory is the fact that Julie and I are still waiting for the boob fairy to come. Wouldn’t a good friend like Karen want to grant us our wish if she was able?

    Maybe Karen is just a wise boob fairy & she is trying to spare us from our own ignorance. She is always saying “boobs aren’t everything”. Hmmm, thoughts to ponder I guess.

    But, just in case the “Dairy Queen” wants to reconsider my plight and take pity on me, I’ll make her another pan of chicken enchiladas and just for extra measure I’ll throw in a cake too. I’m taking special requests right now. So, if “her highness” has any other special requests or needs I’d be willing to oblige.

  20. You guys are so funny. Tom, that’s the best laugh I’ve had in a LONG time. (are single (Christian) people allowed to post on this thread?)

  21. I would imagine that anyone dissed or blessed by the boob fairy and any boob lover is welcome to post, Rob…single or attached. 😉

  22. I forgot to add: Christians like boobs too! (another t-shirt saying if I ever saw one!)

  23. I am not used to guys chiming in during girl talk. It’s kinda weird… Percolations is an equal opportunity blog though, so chime away… We do not discriminate.

  24. Non-discriminatory boob talk….man, is this a great country or what? :)

    Just so you know, we are a little embarrassed about chiming in, but how can we resist?

  25. While feeling so embarassed, my husband still managed to leave 6 out of the 24 comments.

  26. You wondered what the Aunt’s thought. It’s ok, but I was very embarrased when it first came up. Just call me old fashioned. Each generation is born to new ways and ideas of communicating. I know you, your very good. Love ya.

  27. Well, we’re moving on… No more boob talk!

    I am so glad you are reading and commenting, Aunt Marlis!! You would do great with you’re own blog. Maybe we can get you set up! Coming up with a new post is like having a little mini project each day.

  28. Are we all still talking about boobs?

    Why is it that when men say “sweater meat” I always get a bad visual of beef jerky?

  29. I just can’t stop them!

  30. The song is cute, and since I retired I think the butt fairy has visited. But the Hair fairy never came and I still have to Rat my hair to look like I have any. I’d never get any painting done if I had my own blog. But it certainly is fun.
    Aunt tootsie

  31. I’m glad you are having fun!! I am too.

  32. Did you honestly think that once you opened the floodgates that you’d actually get men to *stop* talking about boobs? You opened up a can of worms there! :)

  33. Boob Fairy here. .

    Okay girls, here’s the catch. You get ONE chance to get boobs your whole life. (except for during that period of bearing children and nursing, when boobs grow for purposes of nourishment and to make you feel extra womanly while you feel at your worst.) It comes on that day you truly hit puberty. The boob fairy comes knocking and it depends on how you treat her as to your lot in life. The day the former one knocked on my door I wasn’t listening carefully. She said she was here with breasts and I thought she said “bless” and I said “Give me all ya got!” So she did. Mean lady.

    I’ll still take meals and cakes, though.

  34. Maybe the boob fairy doesn’t like beautiful, six foot blondes!
    Comment by Julie 03.10.05 @ 12:11 pm

    … i can attest to this.. well, at least the 6′ tall, blonde part.

  35. I’ve seen your picture…beautiful is an accurate description, as well.

    Welcome to the dissed club! I’m sure you are ‘spunky, and cute, and have a great personality’!

    There is power in numbers!! Small bosomed ladies unite!! That reminds me of wonder twins activate!!! I can see a big ice boob!!! I loved that cartoon!!

  36. Those of you wondering what the boob fairy looks like, scroll down two posts. She’s sitting in the middle between Mary and I!!!

  37. thanks, Julie! :)
    you’re hilarious.. i loved the Wonder Twins. hehe

  38. Hey Karen,
    Sorry, I’m a little busy this week so your food and cake will have to wait another week or so.:-) However, I’ll see if I can’t come up with something just for you this Friday.

    Oh, and as far as your specific visit from the boob fairy, I’d say you WERE blessed. He, he, he!

    *If you are still in the mood for one of my cakes you can come to the baby shower at Church this Sunday.

  39. Trish and Debbie March 16, 2005 at 6:32 pm

    Remember the itty bitty _____ committee? Long long time ago.

  40. I had forgotten about that!! Thanks for the giggle!

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